Tuesday, December 06, 2005

Worldviews - Before time.


Did you ever feel that long back when you were very young, even though you had hardly seen the world - its people & places, you seem to know what was coming your way for the next many years? Did you?

Sometimes I feel so. Not like a future-teller but I feel I got some hints on the way! Hints which I may have missed?

When my parents went abroad for the first time ( and the only time) they asked me what I wanted. And for some reason I mentioned - a typewriter and a rucksack. I cannot remember why those two items struck me but without them I would have hardly done much that I do today. At work I write 1000s of words each month and sometimes I feel its less to do with my flair to write but more to do with the speed I can type with. And it seriously helps my job. My rucksack motivated me and my friends to travel to places which I doubt we would have thought of ... without seeing ourselves as trekkers of some repute!!

And then I wrote two stories during my college time for the college magazine. One appeared, one did not. No one understood what i wrote and frankly neither did I. But now I think I maybe... or at least I recall them.

The first story was about me and a frog in the college loo!! It was about this frog holed in cavity-in-the-wall in the loo and my relation with it each day and how it develops. To the point that I was not sure why I was going to the loo - for my ego knock with the frog or for nature's call! The story continues through various ups and downs and duels/arguments - till we both turn our backs to each other. And finally, I begin to see a new world and meaning into life and the frog gives way to a book that leads me to a mystery world beyond daily vision. If you see closely, the frog depicted my sexual urges and how I try to cut through their meanings and try to find a social & human purpose in it. Well, in a way, I see the world pretty much like that today!

The next one was about vegetables turning into fruits and how the farmers refuse to accept it. Because they begin extrapolating the issue to the point that they feel their world is going to end now. And they start to destroy every vegetable that has metamorphised into a fruit! However sweet it was. Until they reach a point of famine and the die-hard are even ready to starve.

It is only then they realise that one person's garden still has vegetables as vegetables! This is a single, outcasted person. And the farmers query these vegetables as to why they have been so well behaved while their own vegetables plants are changing into fruit plants - The outcasted person's vegetables answer : " The person you outcasted loves us like his family. So we remain so. But you- you own, sow & eat vegetables but you do not love them... you instead love fruits. So, for years your vegetable plants have been trying to be a fruit so they be loved. Now, they have become what you love and there is no going back on that. Because we grow out of love and not because of the seed you plant!"

And so sense dawns and the village is saved.

I wrote this story once - not exactly, but somewhat on these lines. But its only now that I realise that what we become is what we become in the expectation that whether we will be or will not be loved. That's how and that's when we grow. Else its another way!!

Sometimes, in the world today, we are spending so much time aiming to own power. Like, if someone is good to me its because as if I command that goodness? Or if someone serves me I command that service? What we are essentially doing with this attitude is killing the freedom & choice to serve others and putting a premium on command only. So, if the moral-brigade is worried the wives and children are going stray so be it!.

For the wives in the country no longer feel like being the person who serves her husband simply because she no longer sees any love from the other end for her choice. She instead sees that she is 'expected to', 'its her duty' maybe... but never does she feel that she could really be loved & understood for it - as her choice. It does not matter if most ladies are caring... it is not a statistic... its still their choice as against someone's command or expectation. So now instead she rather be what is loved... and not owned. So, it applies to all aspects of culture. People stick to it through love & a sense of choice ( even if the choice comes to them like second nature/naturally) and not by force/ lectures on morality or even the desire to survive in extreme cases. So, I think. Once the thread is broken, everyone has a right to take the full circle and rediscover themselves once again.

We have forgotten the gifts we were given and only remember to who each gift belongs to!

As for me, I am just learning to realise all this.... slowly...

3 Comments:

Blogger iGotNoTime said...

After not watching the news in more than a year, I turned on the news a few days ago. I came to an awakening... Life goes on, no matter how deeply we try to investigate problems life just goes on. I felt I lost nothing in the past year, and when I got the news back on, I felt I gained nothing nor did I miss out on anything. I had a great happy year with my family, and life will go on next year.

11:36 AM  
Blogger trangam said...

Yes, you are right and you view helps balance. I think as for me sometimes i go into a spin somtimes... I must learn to let things pass by without reading to much into everything!!

10:48 PM  
Blogger iGotNoTime said...

No offense, I didn't mean your writing. I enjoy going into the deeper side of life now and then, and you have great views on it. This is why i linked to you :P

Keep up the great works!

7:50 PM  

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