Saturday, December 31, 2005

There is someone out there....


I desperately want to blog on something nice, but once again, the last 4 days have once again been very very tight - probably the most challenging days in my career. The events that unfolded and my participation would make it one real fine blog, I think. But I cannot write anything for the sake of professional ethics.

All I can say is that I must have taken 100s of calls and missed as many. I was sitting with groups of people working things out late into the night. Papers sprawled around, issues on hand, and my strong aim to maintain honesty, principles in whatever I do in these moments of high stress. My words never had more weight ever before.

Its hard to believe that just before things built up, I had entered the office sleepy tired and thinking if I should go home. And then since that point to now, I have been operating like I need no sleep. Thank God, for making the mind/body flexible enough to rise up to such occasions.

For some reason when things get really tough, one begins to see the world so well. For some reason when you seek help, people offer it? Also I keep getting surprised about the ideas that pop up in my head when in trouble... like someone out there is invisibly pouring it into my head? I keep thinking ... how did I get at that? How did I write that? How did I know this is the person to seek help from? It cannot be me alone... it must be a sum of energies of some kind people and spirits trying to be with me? Its almost like a big scandal - the coming of the problems and the solutions thereon... it just seems its all scripted somewhere like a drama.

And then when I come home last night, the dogs on my door have multiplied from 5 to almost 8!! Like they know I need some company tonight. Quietly they move as my car approaches, stretch out, take new positions and fold up again... watching me as I step out of the car to my door. I look at one of them kindly and the dog kind of perks up in anticiapation... and then I turn away... I do not like to offer my friendship to someone I cannot offer a large amount of time & love. Its better to live off tacit acceptance?

Hope today, things quieten out, and tommorow with the new Yyear brings in much more fun, understanding and time on hand.

So, here's wishing all of you there and also to all the friendly dogs of this world a very Happy New Year!!!

2 Comments:

Blogger JD said...

Again, you've offered something deep to "chew on" for quite a while!

Happy New Year to you, and I hope the bulk of the work-related stress is now behind you.

Keep your standards high. Not everyone will respond appropriately or remain your friend. But the friends you do keep will be the creme-de-la-creme!

7:09 PM  
Blogger Magnoy's Samsara said...

Dr. Clifford Pickover's book does refer to Marcel Proust often. I never read Proust but your observation of dogs makes me think of Proust nevertheless. Happy new year, a big 'woof' and congratulations to your site. Very well written and observed.

2:07 AM  

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